Phermoans

Ok...

I am self-medicating these days. I started on July 30th by cutting down on my Depakote. I was at 1500 mg and went down to 1000 mg. Yesterday I cut that back to 500 mg and next week on the 18th I am going to start skipping odd days with my dose. I weaned myself off of the Lexapro for good this month also. That was an interesting episode. I still feel the similar effects. It's kind of a dizzying and unsettling motion in my head. A flashback if you will. I'm glad I'm sober and doing this as the chemistry in my brain is so whacked right now. I'm not doubting that I have huge issues with depression but I am steeped in denial about the bipolar diagnosis. The more I read the more I believe that I'm not. Of course that is like me being my own attorney in a court of law I guess but I have to go with my gut feeling. I am going to TRY and write here every day my moods, my feelings. The last two days have been long and tedious but I seem to recognize the moods that I am falling into and pull the ripcord before they get out of control. I'll see what happens.

posted by Pher @ 4:43 PM